Monday, July 1, 2013

Been a long time...



Yes, it has been a long time...

There are times in my life where is goes by slowly, and those times seem to have gone far, far away.  I almost feel busier than when school was in session!  Work has definitely picked up a bit, and that is a blessing for sure, but since we still are one position down, it really just means more work for me in the admin area and less time in the marketing area.  I am finding the balance, but I do often feel a little paralyzed-overwhelmed!

Alia is off at camp having what I suppose is a fantastic time since in two week we have received one letter, exactly 4 sentences long, and with 7 spelling errors. Oy!  I am glad to see her smiling in the few pictures I have seen her in.  It makes a difference in my comfort level!

While she is away, we have started an ambitious project for us...redoing her room in four weeks. We have repainted the walls, pulled up the carpet, pulled nails from old hardwood, and are starting to lay the flooring ourselves. By ourselves, I mean ROB. :)  We plan to then add a desk for homework/studying, and redo the decorating in a more "grown up" middle-school style.

Rob and I have been doing a lot of talking, soul searching, wavering, sticking to, figuring out, testing, and deciding about what the heck we are doing spiritually. As everyone knows, I want to move and be a walker. As everyone mostly knows, there are a lot of inherit issue with this - finances, communities, people, ideology, family, etc.  I would have to say that I have taken the last three months to think hard, swerve a bit, re-adjust to the slower time schedule for all of this. I secretly fear we will just stay where we are and not progress. Regardless, time and again I have to remember that this is not my spiritual journey alone.  I need to be sensitive to that.  I also have to remember that I do not have to sacrifice my spirituality for others, necessarily.  I need to be sensitive to that as well.  I am everything. I am nothing.  I am always struggling.

I am still going strong being plant strong. I have delved a bit into the ugliness that can be sometimes called veganism.  Animal issues have always been a part of why I became a vegetarian since a young age and before it was popular.  I stumbled upon the plant strong movement, and its form of being vegan has been tremendously life changing for me.  I follow Dr. Barnard's plant strong diet, and he is (besides being a health advocate) an active ethical vegan, as well as the head of Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine that advocates for healthy vegan eating.

Recently, in an effort to explore my feelings on honey, driven by Alia who decided she would no longer eat honey because of various pro-bee reasons, I joined a few vegan groups. Wow! Way different feel than plant strong groups.  Lots of sensitivities, overreactions, militant and hard lines drawn in the sand, lots of dramatic infighting. However, I have found a handful of people on these boards who are kind, reasonable, and emotionally sound, committed to an ethical principle and willing to share in a non-judgmental way. I am enjoying their posts immensely, and re-learning the dark side of dairy farming. It isn't anything I don't already know, but something I conveniently forgot while scarfing down mass amounts of cheese.  These 1 1/2 years of no dairy products have been easy for me, and I feel great and grateful that I have not had to struggle in this area.

That's the plan, Stan!  :)

1 comment:

Kate Friedman said...

Kalanit,
I enjoyed getting to know you a bit on the phone yesterday, and I told my husband about you and that we share many common interests. Love the reference to vegan as plant-strong; I am not vegan but plant-strong and always striving for the ideal (in one area, another, or all of them, if I'm crazy enough!) I am looking forward to getting to know your family. I wish you hatzlacha on your spiritual journey toward shabbat "walking-hood" and I hope things go speedily in the direction you hope to go. Keep aiming for that, it is SO worth it!!!